Here’s an oldie but goodie from my Sporting News vault.  It’s a spoof so I hope nobody is offended.


OK, this time I’m not messing around. We are entering the house of a double murderer so I’m locked an loaded. I’m packing a Dirty Harry .44 Magnum so I feel a little secure in O.J. Simpson’s house. O.J. moved to Florida so he can avoid paying Fred Goldman the money he’s owed in the civil suit. He better not slip up again though as Florida will throw his butt on death row.

In the foyer O.J. has two large murals of himself. One is O.J. in his USC jersey. The other he’s wearing Jason’s hockey mask. I’m just playing, he’s in his Bills jersey. When I close the front door it sounds like a prison door being shut. It sends chills down your spine. The house is not well lit. I guess O.J. doesn’t want his neighbors to know what he’s up to.

O.J. has turned the living room into an inventory room for the crap his hocking. He has an ample supply of his book “If I Did It”, a DVD of his “Juiced with O.J. Simpson” Pay-per-view, autographs of his mugshot, and replicas of his famous glove. He also is offering $10 DVDs of The Naked Gun. On the TV, O.J. is running a loop of his famous Hertz car rental commercial. He often sits in his recliner and thinks back to when America loved him.

The kitchen is spotless except for the large cutting board on the counter. Again I feel chills down my spine. O.J. has several large butcher knives prominently on display. In the fridge is some leftover mystery meat and several cartons of Orange Juice. He has taped pictures of himself on the cartons. There is a hand-written note near the phone from Kato Kaelin. Kato is asking to move in with O.J. because he’s tired of being out of the spotlight.

Up the stairs leads to O.J.’s trophy room. After the trial, you almost forget how good of an athlete he actually was. He has awards dating back from his high school days up until the replica HOF bust he got in 1986. He has a plaque commemorating his 2000 season. In place of his Heisman Trophy, O.J. has a replica made out of clay. It’s not quite the same, but O.J. pretends it is. Are you gonna argue with him? Me neither.

O.J. has a King bed with rough linens. He got used to it in jail, and used it ever since. He has portraits of Robert Shapiro, Marcia Clark, and the late Johnnie Cochran. He has his famous leather gloves on the wall with “If it doesn’t fit, you must acquit” stenciled below it. O.J. also has a large hunter knife on his nightstand. That was the last straw. I’m getting out of here.

Heading out the back door you’ll see O.J.’s white Ford Bronco. In the distance O.J. is calling out “hello”. Well, that’s a wrap. I gotta roll. Until next time, this is TSN Cribs.

Past Cribs
John Madden
Dick Vitale
Pete Rose
Tonya Harding
Pacman Jones 
Wilt Chamberlain     
N
ick Saban 
Barry Bonds
Kevin Garnett
Mike Tyson

 | Posted by | Categories: NFL | Tagged: Buffalo Bills, NFL, O.J. Simpson, San Francisco 49ers |

1999 NFL Draft Re-mix

24 May 2008

Here’s a look back at the 1999 to see who the teams would take if they could do it over knowing what they know today.  This was a lot of fun making.  I hope you enjoy it. 

P.S.  I hope nobody gets that Prince song stuck in their head.

#1 Cleveland Browns – Donovan McNabb
Yeah, Tim Couch didn’t exactly work out.  McNabb has had his ups and downs, but the five-time Pro Bowler has had more ups.  He’s thrown for over 25,000 yards, 171 TDs (to 79 INTs), ran for 24 TDs, completed 58.7% of his passes and has a passer rating of 85.8.

#2 Philadelphia Eagles – Champ Bailey Guest Pick – JP)
“The Eagles select this 8x Pro Bowl shutdown cornerback who quarterbacks tend to avoid being that he has 42 career INTS.”

#3 Cincinnati Bengals – Al Wilson
I was tempted to take Torry Holt or Edge, but offense hasn’t been Cincy’s problem.  To solve some defensive woes the Bengals grab the five-time Pro Bowl (two-time All-Pro) LB with 723 tackles, 21.5 Sacks, and 5 INTs.

#4 Indianapolis Colts – Edgerrin James
This pick worked out pretty well for the Colts so why mess with it?  Edge was named All-Pro/Pro Bowler four times.  He has 11,607 career rushing yards with 77 TDs and 3260 receiving yards with 11 TDs. Plus, he made life easier for Peyton.

#5 New Orlenas Saints – Torry Holt
At least Holt’s career didn’t go “Up in Smoke” like their original draft pick.  He’s a two-time All-Pro and seven-time Pro Bowler.  He has 805 receptions for 11,864 yards, and 71 TDs.

#6 St. Louis Rams – Donald Driver
With Holt gone, the “Greatest Show on Turf” would need a replacement.  Donald Driver is the next best option.  He’s a three-time Pro Bowler with 503 receptions for 6977 yards, and 38 TDs.

#7 Washington Redskins – Chris McAllister
With Champ Bailey gone, the ‘Skins go with the next best thing in three-time Pro Bowler Chris McAllister.  He has 411 tackles and 23 INTs in his career.  He’s not the Champ, but he’s not a bad challenger. 

#8 Arizona Cardinals – Patrick Kerney
Instead of the steroid-loving bodybuilding WR David Boston, the Cards would go with a DE that scares QBs instead.  He has 346 Tackles, 72.5 Sacks, and 3 INTs while earning two All-Pro/Pro Bowl nods.

#9 Detroits Lions – Daunte Culpepper
Culpepper has had some highs (two-time All-Pro, three-time Pro Bowler) and lows (Bang Boat), but he would give the Lions something they’ve lacked for years…a skilled QB.  Pep has passed for 22422 Yards and 142 TDs (94 INTs) with a 63.8% completion percentage and a 89.9 passer rating.

#10 Baltimore Ravens – Dre Bly
With McAllister off the board, the Ravens opt for the next best CB in Bly.  He has 416 Tackles to go along with his 38 career INTs.  He’s been named to two Pro Bowls.

#11 Minnesota Vikings – Jevon Kearse
With Culpepper gone and a weak QB crop (Aaron Brooks is the next best thing), the Vikings go with “The Freak”.  The two-time All-Pro and three-time Pro Bowler has 278 tackles and 69.5 Sacks.  He was especially nasty his first three years recording 36 Sacks.

#12 Chicago Bears – Ricky Williams
Hear me out.  Ricky is a gifted Running Back.  He ran for 6354 yards and 41 TDs to go along with 1806 receiving yards and 4 TDs in his first five seasons.  That’s an average of 1632 yards and 9 TDs.  Sure he flaked out, but getting five great seasons from a RB is pretty good.  Plus, playing for the Bears fans may have inspired him to avoid his temptations.  If not, you still get that ground game cooking for five years.

#13 Pittsburgh Steelers – Joey Porter
The Steelers originally got Joey with the 73rd pick, but if they want the three-time All-Pro and Pro Bowler they would have to take him here.  Not that their original pick of Troy Edwards did much anyway.  Talent-wise I probably would have went with Porter for Cincy, but they don’t need any more troubled athletes.  Porter has 533 Tackles, 65.5 Sacks, and 12 INTs in his career. 

#14 Kansas City Chiefs – Jon Jansen
John Tait is pretty good, but I think Jansen is a little better Tackle.  When he stays healthy he’s one of the better offensive lineman in the game. 

#15 Tampa Bay Buccaneers – Mike Rucker
Instead of Booger McFarland (must have been a huge Revenge of the Nerd fan), the Bucs would great Mike Rucker, who has 421 tackles and 55.5 Sacks. He made one Pro Bowl team.

#16 Tennessee Titans – Rod Coleman
Tennessee turns to Pro Bowler Rod Coleman to fill the void of Jevon Kearse.  The big fella has 271 tackles and 58.5 Sacks.  He was also named to one Pro Bowl.

#17 New England Patriots – Damien Woody
The Pro Bowl offensive lineman can play all three positions and helped New England to two Super Bowl wins.  If they could do it over, they probably wouldn’t change.

#18 Oakland Raiders – L.J. Shelton
Shelton has had a decent career, and would be an upgrade over the original pick of Matt Stinchcomb.

#19 New York Giants – Antoine Winfield
The G-Men go after solid tackling CB Antoine Winfield.  He has 711 tackles and 18 INTs.  He’s had five 80+ tackle seasons.  

#20 Dallas Cowboys – Rosevelt Colvin
The Cowboys add pass-rush specialist Rosevelt Colvin.  He has 365 tackles and 52.5 Sacks.

#21 Arizona Cardinals – John Tait
With Shelton gone, the Cards grab John Tait to man their offensive line. 

#22 Seattle Seahawks – Aaron Smith
Instead of flopping with Lamar King, the Seahawks grab Pro Bowl DE Aaron Smith.  Smith has 366 tackles and 36.5 Sacks.

#23 Buffalo Bills – Dexter Jackson
The Bills add S Dexter Jackson to beef up their secondary.  He has 460 tackles and 17 INTs.

#24 San Francisco 49ers – Eric Barton
The 49ers go with LB Eric Barton, who has 638 tackles, 18.5 Sacks, and 4 INTs.  He has four 100 tackles seasons.

#25 Green Bay Packers – Mike McKenzie
The Pack orginally got him with the 87th pick, and he caused them a headache as he forced his way out of town, but he gave them five solid years when he collected 287 tackles and 15 INTs.  Overall he has 26 picks.

#26 Jacksonville Jaguars – Marty Booker
The Jags add Pro Bowl WR Marty Booker to team with McCardell and Jimmy Smith.  He has 6311 yards and 34 TDs.  He had a pair of 1000 yard seasons. 

#27 Detroit Lions – Desmond Clark
The Lions give new QB Daunte Culpepper a big target at TE to work with .  The Pro Bowler has 3067 yards and 24 TDs.

#28 New England Patriots – Dat Nguyen
The Pats swung and missed with Andy Katzenmoyer.  The grab the undersized LB Dat Nguyen instead.  Nguyen had 516 tackles, 6 Sacks, and 7 INTs.  He had three 100 tackles seasons.

#29 Minnesota Vikings – Aaron Brooks
I hate to do it, but without Culpepper the Vikes do need a QB.  Michael Vick’s cousin had 20,261 yards, 123 TDs (92 INTs), 1534 Rushing yards and 13 TDs.  He wasn’t the best QB, but he did have four straight 3500+ yard/21+ TD seasons.

#30 Atlanta Falcons – Luke Petitgout
Petitgout has been a solid Tackle for the G-Men for 8 years before going to Tampa Bay.  Atlanta would be happy with him.

#31 Denver Broncos – Chris Claiborne
He’s no Al Wilson, but Claiborne is a serviceable LB.  He had 570 tackles, 15 Sacks, and 8 INTs.  He had three straight 100+ tackle seasons.

Previous Re-Mixes
2000 Re-mix
2001 Re-mix
2002 Re-mix
2003 Re-mix

Well, it’s my wife’s due date today.  Still holding out.  We’ll see.  It was another busy sports week.


Once again the Celtics couldn’t get it done on the road as LeBron (32 points, 12 rebounds, 6 assists) forced Game 7.   The Lakers showed they have what it takes to win on the road (in the toughest building no less) as they sent Utah packing in Game 6 behind Kobe’s 34 points.  Andrew Bynum is having knee surgery.  Paul Pierce’s 41 points trumped LeBron’s 45 as the Celtics beat the Cavs in Game 7.  You can’t count them out until they are out.  New Orleans couldn’t take care of business at home in Game 7 and San Antonio advanced to face the Lakers.  Kobe can’t be happy.  The Bulls beat the odds and won the NBA Lottery.  I’m sorry, but that system is broke.  If you can’t trust your teams won’t tank, there are bigger problems with your league than just bad refs.  Sorry.  The Celtics continued their home cooking by taking Detroit out in Game 1.  The Big Two (KG & Pierce) led the way.  Kobe’s 27 points helped lead the Lakers to a Game 1 win over Tim Duncan (30 points, 18 rebounds) and the Spurs.  It appears the Celtics can be beat at home.  Rip Hamilton led the way with 25 points.  The Big 3 (Ray Allen’s milk carton campaign must have worked) scored 75, but they got nothing from the bench.
 
 

Dallas won Game 5 to get back in the series.  The still trail 3 Games to 2.  Pittsburgh sent Philly packing 6-0 to win the series 4 games to 1.  Detroit said enough is enough as they sent Dallas packing, earning them a date with Pittsburgh in the Stanley Cup Finals.  The Bruins signed D Aaron Ward to a contract extension.  Jeremy Roenick will play again next year with San Jose.  Still waiting for the Stanley Cup Finals to get going.  Vancouver gave Coach Alain Vigneault a contract extension.  Colorado is going wiih Tony Granato as their new Coach.  Dallas gave co-GMs Brett Hull and Les Jackson three-year extensions.
 

Friday:  Jayson Werth hit 3 HRs and had 8 RBI for the Phillies.  Alfonso Soriano and Josh Hamilton each hit a pair of HRs.  The Cards put Jason Isringhausen on the DL.  Saturday:  Soriano smashed two more HRs.  Rod Barajas hit a pair of HRs, one a Grand Slam.  Sunday:  Randy Johnson won his 288th career game.  Big Papi, Ryan Bruan, Mike Napoli, and Orlando Cabrera,  hit a pair of HRs.  Monday:  Jon Lester fired a no-hitter.  Jacque Jones signed with Florida.  Albert Pujols and Frank Thomas each hit a pair of HRs.  Tuesday:  A-Rod is back in the lineup. He hit a HR.  Mike Piazza called it quits.  Hunter Pence hit a Grand Slam.  Wednesday:  Brandon Webb finally lost.  Ryan Howard, Jack Cust, Vladimir Guerrero, and Jermaine Dye each hit a pair of HRs.  Bartolo Colon won for Boston.  Marcus Thames hit a Grand Slam.  Thursday:  J.D. Drew and Mike Lowell both hit Grand Slams.  Moises Alou returned to the DL.  Ken Griffey, Jr. hit HR #598.
 

The Bengals released Odell Thurman.  Dan Morgan retired.  Dallas signed Marion Barber III and Terence Newman to long-term deals.  The Raiders cut S Stuart Schweigert.  Mike Keenan is the new Cleveland Browns President.  The Raiders signed QB Marques Tuiasosopo.
 
 
Florida State WR Preston Parker was suspended two games after pleading guilty to misdemeanor gun charges.  Clemson LB Cortney Vincent will miss the 2008 season (suspension) and their WR Jeff Ogren is transferring. 
 
 
Iowa’s Tony Freeman is transferring to Southern Illinois.  Akron’s Rydell Brooks was arrested for shooting at police.  Unfortunately it wasn’t baskets.  Providence G Dwain Williams is transferring to Long Beach State.  Indiana kicked F Brandon McGee to the curb.

Big Brown took the Preakness.
 
Ryuji Imada won the AT & T Classic.
 
Kasey Kahne won NASCAR’s All-Star Challenge.  The Indy 500 is this weekend. 
 
That concludes the Tidbits. As always feel free to add any stories you liked this week in sports or discuss any of the stories I mentioned.
 
Thanks again for supporting my blog. Be sure to check out Links for some great websites.

 | Posted by | Categories: MLB, NBA, NFL, NHL | Tagged: MLB, NBA, NFL, NHL |

Since my wife will give birth to our second child any day now, I figured I’d post some oldies but goodies from my Sporting News vault.  This is a spoof so I hope nobody takes offense.

Well, we have a special treat for you today boys and girls. We are going to get a glimspe into Adam Pacman Jones’ new crib. Sure, you’ve seen his mansion and cars on MTV Cribs, but only on TSN Cribs can you get a picture of how he’s living today.

Security is an important part of Pacman’s crib. In fact you’ll notice his entire crib is surrounded by bars. You have to sign in and pass through security to enter the crib, and you’re only allowed access to designated parts of the crib. Only his roommate “Bubba” and his guards are allowed to enter the crib. He hasn’t been here long so you’ll notice there isn’t any decorations on the walls except for the postcard that Vince Young sent him that says “Nice knowing you”.

Pacman is adjusting to his new bed. He no longer has a need for his king size Sleep Number bed. He’s going old school with a twin size bunk bed. Since Bubba is much bigger than Pacman, he has chosen the bottom bunk. No silk sheets for Pacman on this bed. He has standard issue white sheets with an itchy gray blanket. One small pillow is all he has to work with.

Now on to the bathroom. Just steps away from the bed is a toilet, which is very convenient. There are no doors for the bathroom so he has to get used to going in public. No Charmin rolls here. Only the paper thin, virtually see-through toilet paper is provided. Next to the toilet is a sink where Pacman brushes his gold teeth. There is no mirror in the bathroom for safety reasons. No medicine cabinet either.

Now on to the dining room. The dining room is huge. It holds 2000 people. You grab a tray and make your way down the food line. The food is not gourmet, but occasionally it’s warm. Since the security is maximum, there are no forks and knives to use. Everything must be eaten with a spoon or your fingers. You only get one trip in the line so if you spill your food, you’re pretty screwed. There are no bottles of Cristal flowing. Alcohol is forbidden in Pacman’s crib.

Finally, we’ll take a tour of the yard. It is also fenced in with armed guards. There are tracking dogs in case someone gets “lost”. There are plenty of weights to work out with here. Often Pacman puts together a pick up football game. Pacman is always one captain, while Chris Henry is typically the other. If Pacman isn’t in the mood to lift or play football, he can always go the craft room and make license plates.

Well, it’s time for roll call. I better get out of here before the place goes on lockdown. Thanks for the interview Pacman. See you in 5-10 years pal.

Past Cribs
John Madden
Dick Vitale
Pete Rose
Tonya Harding

Let’s face it.  When your the NBA and in the middle of a gambling scandal, your reputation is on shaky ground.  Your credibility is such that you have to have a draft lottery to keep teams from tanking (they do anyway – ahem Minnesota a few years ago).  How are we supposed to respect a product when you can’t even trust your teams to do the right thing.  I understand that with five starters and a smaller rosters, a single player can make more of an impact on an NBA team than an NFL one.  However, you can’t tell me you’re unable police a handful of teams to make sure they are on the up and up.  If you can’t do that, how can we expect you to keep your refs in line.  Not to mention doing away with the lottery removes the conspiracy theories about rigged drafts.  I, for one, would like to see the actual selection take place.  Sorry, I’m not big on trusting a league that is so secretive.  You say its for suspense and drama, but come on.  I’m not buying it.  Adapt the NFL’s reverese record for determining draft picks.

Don’t get all high and mighty NFL.  You have your own problems.  Did you happen to see the contrat that Matt Ryan signed with Atlanta.  I think he has enough to spring Michael Vick from jail.  I don’t understand how a rookie coming into the league can make more than Pro Bowlers at the same position.  Sorry, that doesn’t sit well with me.  I understand the window to make a living in the NFL isn’t open very long, but there has to be a better way.  How about coming up with some sort of slot like the NBA does.  I know different positions make different monies so it will be complicated.  The NFL has a full year and plenty of money to throw talented people at this problem to come up with a viable solution.  I don’t care if it’s complicated.  I just want to know that Jake Long isn’t making as much as Walter Jones or McFadden pulling in more than Brian Westbrook.  Even if the perfect solution isn’t discovered right away, at least doing something will bring you closer to it.  Something has got to give. 

 | Posted by | Categories: NBA, NFL | Tagged: Matt Ryan, NBA, NFL Draft, NFL. NBA Draft |

Since my wife will give birth to our second child any day now, I figured I’d post some oldies but goodies from my Sporting News vault.  This is a spoof so I hope nobody takes offense.

Welcome to TSN Cribs where we show you how your favorite sports personalities live. This week John Madden has been kind enough to give us a glimpse into his life when he’s not rolling in the Madden Cruiser. You’ll notice as you pull up the driveway you have ample dining choices. Madden has the only personal Burger King and Taco Bell in the U.S. Madden says “hey, a lot of times you never know when you’re going to need a snack on the way from the street to my house. I mean sometimes you need a burger, and when you need a burger nobody does it your way like Burger King. Other times you need a Chulupa and nobody chulups a chulupa like Taco Bell. Then sometimes I get a Whopper and stuff a soft taco inside. He he he.”


As you enter the foyer you’ll notice a large painting on the wall. It’s a lovely oil painting of John Madden and Brett Favre. Madden says “nobody plays like Brett Favre when he plays like Brett Farve unless Brett Favre isn’t playing like Brett Farve.” The entire house is carpeted in green and all of the window treatments are yellow. Next I’ll talk you to the kitchen.

In the kitchen you’ll notice 4 refrigerators stacked up side by side. Madden chuckles “you know I have one for all my breakfast foods. You don’t want to run out of sausage, bacon, ham, pancake or waffle batter, french toast, eggs. Then I have my lunch fridge. There are a lot of ways to go here. You can do brats. Brett Farve got me the secret Lambeau recipe. You can also go with pizza or lunch meat. I have burgers in case I don’t want to make the long trip down to my driveway. Then I have the dinner fridge. I keep that stocked with whole lasagna platters and turkduckens. Finally I have the snack fridge for in between meals. I spend more time in here than any other room. He he he.”


Next we go to the Master Bedroom. Notice how Madden got a replica of Shaq’s bed. However, instead of the Superman S, there is a giant #4 on the comforter. On the night stand is a game worn Brett Favre jockstrap. Madden says “when I have a hard time sleeping, this works perfectly to block out the light” as he takes a whiff and then models it for the camera. Check out my plasma TV. I don’t actually get cable, but I have hidden cameras installed in Favre’s house and locker stall. We’re real good friends and I like knowing he’s close.” On the TV you can see Brett Farve starting to undress to take a shower. Madden begins shoving the cameraman. “That’s a wrap. Thanks cribs, but you have to leave now.” Madden has a scary glimmer in his eye and a wry smile on his face.

Until next time. Thanks for watching TSN Cribs.

 | Posted by | Categories: NFL | Tagged: Brett Favre, John Madden, NFL, Uncategorized |

2003 NFL Draft Re-mix

17 May 2008

Here’s a look back at the 2003 (the year of the Cornerback) to see who the teams would take if they could do it over knowing what they know today.  This was a lot of fun making.  I hope you enjoy it

#1 Cincinnati Bengals – Carson Palmer
There are some other solid choices, but none better at the Quarterback position.  Palmer helped bring the Bengals back to respectability.  Unfortunately the team’s inability to stay on the right side of the law has crushed their potential.  The former Heisman is a two-time Pro Bowler.

#2 Detroit Lions – Kevin Williams
Sorry Millen, I’m not taking your collarbone breakin’, weed smokin’ Charles Rogers.  I’m going with three-time Pro Bowl/All-Pro Kevin Williams to team with Shaun Rogers to form one of the league’s best defensive lines.

#3 Houston Texans – Andre Johnson
I’ll stick with Houston’s pick.  Andre is a two-time Pro Bowler with a pair of 1000 yard seasons.  He’s really coming into his own.

#4 New York Jets – Lance Briggs
Briggs is a three-time Pro Bowler (two-time All-Pro) started his career with four straight 100 tackle seasons.  He’s averaged close to 109 tackles per season in his career and added 6 INTs.

#5 Dallas Cowboys – Larry Johnson
LJ is an absolute beast having recorded two 1700 yard seasons already.  He is a two-time Pro Bowler/All-Pro with 60 career TDs.

#6 New Orleans Saints – Troy Polamalu
A good way to upgrade a defense that has been struggling for years would be to add a four-time Pro Bowler (two-time All-Pro) Safety.  He is seemingly everywhere on defense.  He has tallied 359 tackles, 7 Sacks, and 10 INTs. 

#7 Jacksonville Jaguars – Anquan Boldin
Jacksonville hasn’t had a good receiver since Jimmy Smith retired.  Boldin would have helped in the last few years of his career and gave them a #1 going forward.  He has earned two Pro Bowl trips in his young career, has three seasons with 1200+ receiving yards, and a couple of 100+ reception seasons.

#8 Carolina Panthers – Terrell Suggs
With Kris Jenkins and Julius Peppers up front, Terrell Suggs would have been even more disruptive with the Panthers.  The two-time Pro Bowler has 300 career tackles and 45 Sacks. 

#9 Minnesota Vikings – Osi Umenyiora
The Vikings hit a Home Run with Kevin Williams, but with him off the board they would turn to two-time Pro Bowler Umenyiora.  He has 41.5 career sacks (including six in a game vs. the Eagles last year).

#10 Baltimore Ravens – Asante Samuel
With the main pash rushers gone, the Ravens would turn to the best defensive back available.  Asante is a true shutdown corner that would team with Chris McAllister and Ed Reed to make it impossible to complete a pass.  He has 232 career tackles and 22 INTs (three of which he took to the house).

#11 Seattle Seahawks – Marcus Trufant
I’ll stick with Seattle’s pick here.  Trufant has been named to one Pro Bowl, recorded 394 tackles, and picked off 16 passes.  Can’t complain about that.

#12 St. Louis Rams – Ty Warren
Not many players plug up the middle like Ty Warren.  He has 286 career tackles and 17.5 Sacks.  He’d certainly be a better pick than Jimmy Kennedy was. 

#13 New England Patriots – Nick Barnett
The Patriots would go head over heals for a solid, young LB like Barnett.  He’s recorded 100+ tackles every year in the league (609 total, 121.8 average).  He also has 11.5 Sacks and 9 INTs.  Amazingly he’s never made a Pro Bowl.

#14 Chicago Bears – Willis McGahee
The Bears help solve their offensive woes by adding the dynamic Willis McGahee, who earned his first Pro Bowl trip last year.  He won’t help immediately as he sat out the 2003 seasons, but ran for 1000 yards every years since (2006 he ran for 990, but close enough).  He’s averaged 1143 rushing yards and 184 receiving yards in his career.  He’s scored 32 TDs.

#15 Philadelphia Eagles – Jason Witten (Guest Pick – JP)
The Eagles add a great weapon to the arsenal in Witten. He only has been selected to 4 Pro Bowls (2004-2007). His career stats are impressive with 348 receptions, 3,983 receiving yards and 21 TDs. He had his first 1,000+ yard season last year. Witten tied an NFL record with 15 receptions in one game. Witten is the complete tight end who has great size, soft hands and exceptional athleticism who can make the big plays anywhere on the field.”

#16 Pittsburgh Steelers – Ken Hamlin

With Troy Polamalu gone, the Seahawks would go with Hamlin, the next best Safety.  He has 360 career Tackles and 13 INTs.  In Pittsburgh, where the team and players are more revered, he probably wouldn’t have got his skull crushed in, which would give him even better numbers.

#17 Arizona Cardinals – Nnamdi Asomugha
The Cardinals select Asomugha who is one of the games better cover corners.  He doesn’t get thrown to much so his 217 Tackles and 9 INTs seem low, but the Pro Bowler has the skills.

#18 Arizona Cardinals – Rashean Mathis
Why not go for the gusto and add another starting Cornerback.  Mathis is a Pro Bowler with 334 career Tackles and 21 INTs.  This duo would make it tough to pass on the Cards.

#19 Baltimore Ravens – E.J. Henderson
The Ravens go with a solid RB in Henderson.  He took a little while to get his groove, but playing under the leadership and guidance of Ray Lewis, E.J. would likely hit his stride sooner.  He has 227 Tackles and 7.5 Sacks over the past two seasons.

#20 Denver Broncos – Terrence McGee
Terrence McGee is a solid CB as well as an explosive return man.  He has 351 career Tackles and 13 INTs to go along with 6 career Return TDs.  He has made one Pro Bowl and named an All-Pro twice.

#21 Cleveland Browns – Terence Newman
The Browns would bolster their secondary with the selection of Pro Bowler Terence Newman.  He has 319 Tackles and 16 INTs. 

#22 Chicago Bears – Charles Tillman
The Bears would select Peanut here (instead of with the 35th Pick like they actually did) because he’s been an important part of their defense.  He has 335 Tackles and 17 INTs. 

#23 Buffalo Bills – Dallas Clark
The Bills would grab Clark, who is the best Tight End in the draft.  He would provide Drew Bledsoe a solid target in the immediate future and J.P. Losman a security blanket down the road.  He has 2234 Yards and 25 TDs.  Last year he went for 616 & 11.

#24 Indianapolis Colts – Robert Mathis
Instead of taking him with the 138th pick, the Colts would grab Mathis here.  He has 207 Tackles and 42 Sacks.  He’s averaged 9.6 Sacks the past four years.

#25 New York Giants – Calvin Pace
Calvin didn’t get going until last year for the Cardinals, but his 98 Tackles and 6.5 Sacks were pretty impressive.  He would give the G-Men a flexible defender who could line up at LB or DE.

#26 San Francisco 49ers – Dan Coppen
The 49ers would take care of their Offensive Line by adding Pro Bowl Center Dan Coppen.   

#27 Kansas City Chiefs – Cato June
The Chiefs would add a playmaker on the defense rather than grab another offensive weapon (as they did with LJ).  The Pro Bowl LB has averaged just over 107 Tackles the past four years, including an impressive 142 in 2006.  He also has an impressive 11 career INTs.

#28 Tennessee Titans – Ricky Manning, Jr.
In a draft full of CBs the Titans sure missed the boat with Andre Woolfolk.  If they could get a mulligan, they would take Ricky Manning, Jr., who has 265 Tackles and 14 INTs.

#29 Green Bay Packers – Kawika Mitchell
The Pack would grab LB Kawika Mitchell here.  He has 380 Tackles, 8 Sacks, and 4 INTs.  He’s averaged 95 Tackles the past three years.

#30 San Diego Chargers – Nate Burleson
The Chargers would go with Nate Burleson to give them another option to go along with LT and Gates.  He has 195 Receptions for 2675 Yards, and 23 TDs.  He’s had two 9 TD seasons. 

#31 Oakland Raiders – Eric Steinbach
The Raiders would help their pathetic Offensive Line by adding Steinbach, a solid Guard.

#32 Oakland Raiders – Jeff Faine
The Raiders would further improve their line by adding Center Jeff Faine.  With two solid OL choices to end the first round, perhaps the Raiders wouldn’t be such a joke.

Previous Re-Mixes
2000 Re-mix
2001 Re-mix
2002 Re-mix

The Lakers had no answer for Carlos Boozer (27 points, 20 rebounds) in Game 3 as the Jazz made the series 2 Games to 1.  The Knicks landed Mike D’Antoni.  Dallas opted for Rick Carlisle. Detroit won without Chauncey Billups (hamstring) to take a 3-1 series lead.  Rip’s 32 points led the way.  Cleveland beat Boston in Game 3.  The C’s still have a 2-1 lead.  Deron Williams had 29 points and 14 assists as Utah evened the series at 2 vs. the Lakers.  Tim Duncan had 22 points and 15 boards as San Antonio evened up with the Hornets.  KG, Kobe, Bruce Bowen, Marcus Camby, and Tim Duncan were named First Team NBA All-Defensive Team.  Cleveland took Game 4 to even the series with Boston.  The C’s just can’t win on the road.  Jameer Nelson looked stupid when the Pistons beat Orlando without Chauncey Billups to advance to the Eastern Conference Finals.  Robert Horry set the record for most playoff games.  Kevin Durant, Al Horford, Luis Scola, Al Thornton, and Jeff Green were named to the All-NBA Rookie Team.  New Orleans blasted the Spurs behind David West’s 38 points and 14 rebounds.  Danny Ainge was named Executive of the Year.  I’m shocked Kevin McHale didn’t win.  KG & Pierce combined for 55 points as the Celtics dumped the Cavs (at home of course) despite a good shooting game from LeBron finally.  The Lakers did their thing at home to take a 3-2 series lead.  The Spurs drilled the Hornets in Game 6 to even their series.

Joel Quenneville  won’t be returning as the Avs Coach next year.  Evgeni Malkin had tow goals and an assist as Pittsburgh took Game 1 vs. Philadelphia 4-2.  Johan Franzen didn’t play, but Detroit won anyway for a 2-0 series lead.  Make it 2-0 for the Penguins as well as they took out the Flyers 4-2.  The NHL decided to let Chris Osgood and Mike Ribeiro off with a fine rather than suspensions for their altercation.  San Jose fired Ron Wilson.  Pavel Datsyuk netted a hat trick as Detroit took a commanding 3-0 series lead vs. Dallas.  Boston re-signed F Chuck Kobasew.  Marian Hossa netted a couple of goals as Pittsburgh took a 3-0 series lead over Philly in the Keystone State Showdown.  Dallas avoided a sweep by beat Detroit in Game 4.  The Flyers also avoided a sweep by taking out the Penguins.

Friday:  Richie Sexson was suspended six games for charging the mound.  Jimmy Rollins returned from the DL.  San Diego cut Jim Edmonds.  James Shields threw a one-hitter.  Saturday:  Hanley Ramirez signed a six-year, $70 million deal.  Vernon Wells will be out six to eight weeks with a broken wrist.  Ben Sheets became Milwaukee’s career strikeout leader.  Grady Sizemore went yard twice.  Dan Uggla hit a Grand Slam.  Jeff Keppinger collected five hits.  Greg Maddux finally earned win #350.  Sunday:  Eric Gagne is out as a closer.  His stuff isn’t as nasty without the “stuff”.  Dan Uggla, Ryan Braun, and Craig Monroe each hit a pair of HRs.  Monday:  Asdrubal Cabrera turned an unassisted triple-play.  Fausto Carmona fired a Complete Game Shutout.  Cliff Lee pitched 9 scoreless Innings to lower his ERA to 0.67.  Tuesday:  Jeff Keppinger broke his knee cap.  Eric Gagne earned a Save.  Randy Johnson earned Win #287.  Wednesday:  Clay Buchholz and Ryan Doumit landed on the DL.  Tampa locked up Scott Kazmir for three years at $28.5 million.  Let’s see, Carlos Silva got $48 for four years.  Well done Rays.  Well done.  Jim Edmonds signed with the Cubs.  Jay Payton, Carlos Quentin and Matt Stairs hit Grand Slams.  C.C. Sabathia threw a Complete Game Shutout.  Manny Ramirez caught a fly, high-fived a fan, and then doubled off the runner at first.  Thursday:  Cole Hamels threw a Complete Game Shutout.  Milwaukee signed Ryan Braun to a eight-year, $45 million deal.  Nice value.  Nick Johnson landed on the DL.  Brandon Webb improved to 9-0.  The Indians finally gave up a run.

Baltimore TE Quinn Sypniewski wil miss the year with a knee injury.  The Packers cut Koren Robinson.  Robbie Gould signed a five-year, $15.5 million deal with Chicago.  Seattle’s Lofa Tatupu got popped for DUI.  The Brown cut Kenny Wright.  There was plenty of Spygate talk.  I’m tired of it, but at the same time ashamed of my Patriots.

UCF CB Johnell Neal was shot in New Orleans.  Florida DL Matt Patchan was shot in the shoulder in Tampa. The ACC decided 8 conference games were enough.  Former LSU QB Ryan Perrilloux chose Jacksonville State.

There is speculation O.J. Mayo received gifts.  Shocker.  Duquesne G Kojo Mensah is testing the NBA waters.

Sergio Garcia won The Players Championship.

Tony Stewart won the NASCAR Nationwide Series at Darlington.  Kyle Busch won the NASCAR Sprint Cup Series at Darlington. 

Annika Sorenstam will retire after the season.  Justine Henin will do the same, only immediately.

That concludes the Tidbits. As always feel free to add any stories you liked this week in sports or discuss any of the stories I mentioned.

Thanks again for supporting my blog. Be sure to check out My Friends of the Program on the right for some great links. 

Time for the 23rd installment of the NFL Free Agent Report.  Click here for a link to earlier reports.

Robbie Gould
The Shermanator look-alike signed a five-year, $15.5 million deal with Da Bears making him the league’s highest paid Kicker.

Rob Meier
Jacksonville re-signed the DT to a four-year deal.  He had 27 Tackles and 4 Sacks last year.

Jereme Perry
The Brown signed the CB to a one-year deal.  He was a Special Teams player for Miami.

Cut:  Kenny Wright (Cleveland), Jerome Mathis (Washington).

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